Critics Already Deem Sean Preston Federline's Debut Album Too Commercial

Years before his debut single has even been recorded, the infant son of Britney Spears and Kevin Federline is already being panned by critics.

"So much crying," says E! Television's Donna Shinestein. "Tracks like the Ying Yang Twin's Whisper Song are an interesting, unique take on the hip-hop genre. All I've seen Sean Preston do so far is suck on Britney's teat. I mean, come on, who hasn't thought of trying that. It's old news."

The helpless baby has yet to respond, but Ron Masterson, president of Jive Records, who signed the child in his third trimester, spoke on his behalf. "When we made the decision to advance an unborn fetus $2.5 million, we made a commitment to stand behind him as he grows as an artist and a human being. We believe in nurturing our artists, spoon feeding them mashed peas, allowing them to find their voice over the term of their contract."

The album, which has an expected release date of Spring 2018, is tentatively titled: "Who Cares?"